Wonder Woman prevails

How do you describe life as a stay at home mom? Wonderful, fulfilling, challenging, demanding, special, amazing... blah, blah, blah....

What about the days that start out with pancakes and clean clothes but go from leaky breast pads to the full-out mayhem of a one year old with a box of Cap'n Crunch faster than you can say "I wanna be Rachael Ray"?

As I wander from one stinky mess to another, scrubbing bums, carpets, and a week-old sippy cup found under the car seat I realize the stink is following me. Me? I vaguely remember shrugging out of these shorts while falling into bed last night, drenched with the days efforts, drowning in exhaustion. All too soon, I'm back up, grabbing for the closest mound on the floor, pulling back on the shorts from yesterday. Stumbling down the hallway to Paige's room to release the miniature misfit that has taken up residence in her crib.

There are days when I'm able to offer trays of nutritious, perfectly diced fruit for snack and there are days where the scrape of the chair against the kitchen floor is music to my ears because that means they are doing something for themselves.

Right now I feel strung as taut as a guitar, one strum will release me, the tension, and out will come the song of a mother. The harmony of chubby arms around my neck, the flatness of my hairstyle, and the sharps of inadequacy.

I phoned my credit card company to lower my balance protection fee. The poor salesman tried to convince me to keep my plan because "if I'm ever out of work it would be significantly harder to pay my bill". Does this mean that when my kids leave home my balance will be erased? I doubt it. I replied "I do work... and damn hard... unfortunately, I don't get paid for it, so lower my fee... now... please". He dropped it by half and said he'd mail me the info, eager to get off the phone with psycho-mama.

Are there days where I think about walking away and never coming back? Yep, but would I ever? Nope. Are there days when I'd love to crawl back into bed, watch FoodTV, with a pan of brownies all to myself? Oh yeah.

Will I have tender memories of sore shoulders from giving airplane rides and play-dough under my fingernails? Probably. Will I still complain about my carpet-burned knees from being a pony, and chipped toenails and sore toes from being stepped on all day? You bet, it reminds me that what I did today was worthwhile. That I am a stay-at-home-mom. Not that I condone that term... couldn't we come up with something that sounds a bit more realistic.... like WonderWoman perhaps? I'd think about it but my brain is fried between green eggs and ham and trying to remember what that brown stain on my shorts is from.... oh, it's peanut butter from lunch.... yesterday.